A Glance Around

I realize I have not written for a while--- over a month--- but things have just been busy around here and a lot has changed in the past month. I am now on base alone, with visitors about every two weeks, my "chef du base" (base manager) is away on holiday which means I am the base manager along with assisting in logistics, administration, finance and report writing. To be honest, I've been so tired I haven't felt up to writing... or reading... or doing anything that took any extra energy except running. But just visiting for a short while with a friend of mine earlier this evening, finally getting a little sleep over the past few nights, and just the thought that I might get some holiday time at home soon--- I just feel a little revived.

It is so easy to be caught up in our own lives, isn't it? To make what is going on with US the most important thing, to not find the time for others who do mean a great deal to us but--- well we are just busy and do not have time right now. I fall into that role a great deal, probably too much. I get caught up in my own life and work here and I do not stop to see where I am, what I am doing, who my neighbors are, etc. I know we all do this from time-to-time, we get caught in that mentality that what we are doing is extremely important and we just need to "finish this" and "then we'll take the time later". What we seem to forget is that "time" is not always on our side. We had better take the time while we have it. So I thought I would take some time to share with you what I have seen, heard, smelt, felt or tasted over the past few days. They seemed to have made some kind of impression on me.

Walking back from the office the other day the afternoon heat got caught in my nose. It caused me to lessen my pace, feel the intense heat from the sun raining through the opening in the trees, kick my flip-flops off and feel the red dirt between my toes. It must have been around 105'F that day in the sun (mid-90's in my office), but you could still see people out; walking back from the bush where they had just cut leaves, bamboo and whatever else they might use to build a new roof covering to their house or piaot, kids out playing, neighbors out visiting, etc. I could smell the neighbor's charcoal fire which was no doubt preparing their lunch. Covering the scent of charcoal in the air was a hint of taste of beans and rice... which only made me hungrier for lunch. The little boy across the neighboring school yard in his orange and green top, with shorts so dirty I could not make out the original color gave me a big wave as he saw me just standing there, which quickly brought a smile to my face before watching him run off to play with his friends.

Yesterday (Sunday) I was up early as I had to help prepare one of our supervisors to go to the field for the meningitis outbreak in the area. After I sent him off, I walked to the Catholic Cathedral and attended 630am mass (I was there a little late, but in Africa "time" is all relative). The mass was in Lingala and I understood maybe 2% of what was being said. But I know mass well enough that I know the parts of mass and could keep up. I was impressed because for 630am Sunday mass there were more people there than the two most popular sunday masses at my home parish of Our Lady Lourdes. I sqwunched between a young girl and an older woman--- from their interaction with one another, I am guessing of no relation. The music at mass here in Africa always blows me away. My sister-in-law Lori would love the music here. And it is hard not to move to it as well; I find that my foot moves quite a bit. I watched my watch and literally, we went from song to song to song for 25 minutes yesterday (and this is why mass takes 2.5 hrs). But experiencing all of that, you do not even seem to mind. During communion as the choir sang I noticed they were dancing too, the people next to them were dancing, the altar boys were moving around and dancing, the young girls all dressed in white who accompany the priest in and out of mass were dancing (all in rhythm, I might add) around the altar, even a little old man wobbling around on his cane had a swagger to his step when he was returning from communion.

In the back of mass I noticed a woman standing, alone. While mass was packed, Africans have an amazing way to always find a little more room. But this woman did not seem to be making an effort and neither did anyone else. She just stood there, never sitting, never singing, just alone on her own two feet. She was tall and slender or more of a sickly thin, with a long drawn face. She had recently had her hair done because it was in the fashionable tight, straight-stick look coming out of her head in random places. I had noticed her when I first walked into mass. Maybe I noticed the bones from her shoulders and upper spine sticking out from under her skin more than I noticed her right off. The look in her eyes shot straight thru me; it was that look where the emotional side to her life had been stripped from her soul. All that was left was her physical being at this point. But then, she was at mass, for whatever reason I am not sure, but she was there, so her soul was still kicking around within her somewhere. But that glassy-eyed, soulless, life-extinguishing look is seen too frequently around here. Whether it is from being the one member of your family to survive the war, living with AIDS, or something else, that look walks the streets more than I would like here. I got the idea in my head that I would simply go up to her and greet her "good morning" in Lingala after mass. She was gone before the final song.

This evening as I walked out to the latrine, I noticed there was no need for my flashlight. I turned my flashlight off and turned my head straight up--- the moon is just brilliant tonight. It sits between half and two-thirds, illuminating the trees and sprinkling thru to the ground. I just stood there, under the moonlight, looking at it wondering who else could see what I see. Upon walking back from the latrine, I looked a little longer at the moon and noticed that surrounding it at a fair distance was a ring of light. Somewhat like the shadow a golf ball engulfed by the shadow of a basketball ball. It was magnificent in sight. I guess I am just glad I took the time to stop... and look.