a little tougher then expected

I started this blog a few days ago, then stopped because I wasn't really sure how to put things into words. Reading over these transcripts has been a little tougher than I expected. I would have imagined that the reading of case studies dealing with rape and sexual abuse in Congo would have prepared me for this. But maybe not. This isn't about me though. I am perfectly fine. It's not like any of this happened to me and here I am whining about it. I just continue to be surprised that I can't quite "gut" some of the things I am reading--- at this point, I would have thought I could read just about anything without having to get up and walk away in the middle of it.

Maybe it just has to do with my proximity to the situation--- or rather, the situations--- that makes it that more real. And to think I have a hard time reading this, while these people lived it--- it's amazing what a human being will do to survive.

Another lifetime conviction today at the Tribunal. The guy who was convicted is actually the guy who's case I have been reading about. Pretty brutal, but I don't want to get into it on here. There's more on www.irinnews.org if anyone is interested.

Other news... I was attacked by a mosquito the other night in bed. Literally ATTACKED MY FACE!!! Have four bites on one side, two under my chin and even two on my lips! Go figure. I couldn't ever find the stupid thing to kill it, so it survived the night as well.

Jessica gets in tomorrow (Shannon's sister). She's been doing some work in Zimbabwe for the past two weeks, is checking in with a project here for the weekend, and then leaves Tuesday night. I leave first thing Wednesday morning. So we'll actually have three Fleming-born women under one roof. One of these days I am bound and determined to get all Fleming born women under one roof--- there are only five of us, right? How HARD could it possibly be???

Things are still "iffy" whether or not I'll be headed to Goma, but Kigali is a for sure. Because of this situation, I am really trying to catch up on my background reading for Rwanda. I am in the right house for that, luckily; this house is full of things on the genocide and humanitarian affairs dealing with Rwanda.

I am actually excited and nervous to get there-- meaning Kigali. Have been brushing up on my French... but should have never stopped from two years ago. If I seem "missing in action" over the next few days, it could be simply that the internet is down, as it has been down all day. I'll try and post one more time before I leave next week for sure, and then once I am in Kigali postings will be very sporadic. But I'll do my best to keep things updated.